heh...well 2 day was ok. Day went by as usual with no real problems i guess. Well after school 2 day i stayed after cuz jeni didnt want to be alone...so i stayed after 4 her. But then Cory was cool enough to chill with me 4 that long time. haha but of course i was nice enough to give cory and stacey thier "time" 2 gether. I just chilled out and listened to some music. Well then stacey left and me and cory started talking. haha "good" talk man. heh... havent had a talk like that with cory in a long while (or maybe not at all?). but yah it was cool man. Then i was about to go in the gym to go get jeni but then she walked up while cory was talking. So yah...thats cool. Then well they all pretty much left. but when i called nobody was home at my freakin house...so i ended up staying at the school by myself for 30 minutes till my bro could pick me up. Oh well. A boring day 2day. But i dunno...at the same time.. people (especially cory haha) surprised me. I dunno... he truly does got a lot of heart haah u go boy... heh.. ur alot more UNSELFISH than u think doode. heh but i too am like that in a sense. And yah..i no longer expect anything back from ANYONE when i do stuff 4 them... cuz hell.. i do wat i do cuz i care about people.. of course i WANT something back.. cuz that always makes me feel hella good.. but i dunno.. i dont sit there and EXPECT anything. Some would say i expect too much from people... i say i dont EXPECT anything... i would juss like it if sometimes people were a lil more considerate. heh..oh well... my mood is kinda sad rite now. I just realized stuff and i dunno.. im here tryin to help peeps with their problems..giving advice.. or juss being someone that will listen. but shit... is it worth giving advice if people dont follow through? i mean... its nothing but a lost cause. Yet i still do all i can in HOPES that one day those people will TRULY FINALLY understand my view. Everything i do to "help" people is purely 4 the help 4 them. HEH...but wat use is that? About 6 months ago i did the same. Sacraficed my all 4 the hope of anothers well being. But in the end i regret the decision and think sometiems i could have made things worse...4 not ONLY myself..but 4 the other. im trying..im trying...dammit im trying.. and its all 4 all of u.. not me..im so sick of feeling like shit... so why not use my time preductively and help out the people i care and love the most. Heh... but no matter wat i say.. it never really does anything.. nobody reacts..only a few TRUELY listen. I always end up saying "i told u so" in my head. Heh.. i do all i can...its unfortunate that everything i say these days.. people take as trash. oh well...im here 4 all of u. and especially **YOU**...and u know who "you" are. I'll never leave ur side...ive beld 4 u...ive cried 4 u.. ive been through hell 4.. i cant leave u..u need me to much.. and i need u.. i care too much..im here 4 u..always.
posted by Philip at 10:51 PM